For most of my life I have struggled with this simple thought: I'm not good enough. Not a good enough son. Not a good enough brother. Not a good enough singer. Not a good enough piano player. Not a good enough song writer. Not a good enough friend. Not a good enough husband ... father ... leader ... pastor ... Christian.
Not a good enough person.
Don't get me wrong, I have an AMAZING family and AWESOME friends. THEY haven't made me feel this way. I have an UNBELIEVABLY GRACIOUS GOD who has never made me feel that way. The only person that makes me feel "not enough" is me.
It is my nature to size myself up to everyone around me, only seeing the best of them and the worst of me.
Every Sunday when I preach I battle the thought, "Who cares what I have to say?" As I write this blog I wrestle with, "Who is going to read anything that I write?" "So many others can say it so much better, what do I have to add?"
But of late, as I've turned the corner on 40 years old (I hit 41 last September), I've decided to take my voice a little more seriously. After all, God's the One who gave it to me. It's His platform, and I'm here by invitation, and this platform will not last forever.
Why should I short-change Him by short-changing who He created me to be?
As a not-as-young-as-I-once-was guy, I'm becoming more and more comfortable with who I am and the voice that I have, in large part because of one verse in the Bible that empowers my ordinariness:
"The members of the council were amazed when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, for they could see that they were ordinary men with no special training in the Scriptures. They also recognized them as men who had been with Jesus." - Acts 4:13
I love what the leaders of the day recognized in this moment: these men were ORDINARY, but they had been with someone who was EXTRAORDINARY.
God doesn't need me to be extraordinary. He doesn't ask me to be more than I'm capable of being. He just asks me to be exceptional in my ordinariness, because HE is exceptional IN ME.
So the blog formerly known as "Brick Walls" has now become the blog of "An Ordinary Guy."
Here's to being ordinary!